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Tuesday, January 18, 2011

A Quiet Tribute Today is the anniversary of my mother's seems about six lifetimes ago...and just yesterday.  I was a teen when it happened and even though I've spent most of my life without her, she is always with me in my heart.  We, as a family, do a great job keeping her spirit alive for those generations that never had a chance to meet her.  I see her in the faces of her grandchildren and great grandchildren...a gesture, an act, a smile.

My mother was extraordinary...the kind of mom everyone wants.  She was bright, dedicated, compassionate, and creative.  She was a R.N. Administrator for a small private hospital in Providence, R.I. for many years before we moved to the Berkshires.  She was a quiet leader; leading by example, bringing out the best in all of her people...they were devoted to her.  All the business school books talk about the kinds of power you can have as a leader: personal, positional,etc....hers was definitely personal.  When a crisis occurred, she never asked who made the mistake but concentrated on fixing it...she used a team-based approach to leadership, before that now over-used term was ever invented!  Later in her career, she did private duty nursing, primarily for terminal patients, because of her reputation for compassion, empathy, and maintaining a level of respect for the person about to leave this world...and for their families.  She wrote poetry about these experiences that spoke with respect of the lives they had led.

My mom could relate to people of all ages.  Often times my friends would go to her with a problem and she would listen and ask the right questions until they knew the right thing to do in their hearts.  She was always a bit of a little girl...even when she was grown up; always ready for a good laugh, emotional when it came to the successes and triumphs of her children...or when she looked into the eyes of the grandchildren she was able to meet.

She was the mother of six children and had that unique quality of making each of us feel like we were the favorite...although I truly was, hehe...see what I mean?  She was so creative...writing poetry, sewing, and helping six children with art projects or making our Halloween costumes.  My favorite costume was the year she made me an artist with a smock, a tam, and an artist's pallet she constructed out of cardboard and paint.  I carried a brush too!  My mother was always surrounded by fabric...she made our clothes, not to save money but because her designs were better and made of better quality materials...she was my biggest influence when it came to knowing the quality and excellence of handmade.  I can remember leaving for school and by the time I got home, she'd have three outfits ready for me to try on and hem...and they were gorgeous!

So on this day of her passing, I'd like to just say, all that I am is because of my mom.  She was my best friend, my most devoted champion, and  my hero!  Anyone I love or admire in the present time has the qualities she possessed whether it was a kind heart, a loving soul, or an undying spirit!

Even though I think of Mom every time I create, I am dedicating this piece to says it all!


Tippy Stockton said...

Hi Deb - I follow your blog on a regular basis - I love to see what you have going. I saw this post last night and resisted leaving you a note. But I will today as I am in a better frame of mind. I too had my own quiet tribute to my dear Mom on Monday. She passed away two years ago. Her death is still raw; just the thought of her brings me to tears. There's just so many unanswered questions. But she sent me a sign on Monday - I'm taking it as a push for me to celebrate her life, rather than wallow in sadness. Before she passed away, I asked her to send me sunshine (I live in Seattle). We have had torrential rain for 14 straight days, but on Monday morning for mere minutes the sun came out like it was the middle of Summer. I smiled and thanked her for sending me this gift. I understand your feelings. I'm so sorry. I hope you have peace in the love your Mom had for you.

Unknown said...

Oh my goodness Tippy, for some reason I was looking through my old blog posts and found your response! It was like a wonderful gift but I am so sorry I didn't respond sooner! I am sorry for your loss and hope that you find comfort in the fact that you will carry your mom always in your heart! Thank you for your post!!

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